Quote of the Day (2008-08-29)

Homer: Homer no function beer well without.

Source: The Simpsons

Quote of the Day (2008-08-28)

Dennis, there's some lovely filth down here.

Source: Holy Grail

Quote of the Day (2008-08-27)

It's only a flesh wound.

Source: Holy Grail

Life Imitating A Bug's Life

One of the projects I'm working on always makes me think of A Bug's Life (starting at about 2:10) in their inability to deal with change:



[a leaf falls in front of one of the worker ants in the food line]
Worker Ant #1: I'm lost! Where's the line? It just went away. What do I do? What do I do?
Worker Ant #2: Help!
Worker Ant #3: We'll be stuck here forever!
Mr. Soil: Do not panic, do not panic. We are trained professionals. Now, stay calm. We are going around the leaf.
Worker Ant #1: Around the leaf. I-I-I don't think we can do that.
Mr. Soil: Oh, nonsense. This is nothing compared to the twig of '93.
Mr. Soil: Ok, step carefully....easy...easy...you're doing great! Ah, there we go! Watch my eyes, don't look away. And look! Here's the trail!
Worker Ant #1: Oh, thank you! Thank you!

Quote of the Day (2008-08-26)

I feel happy... I feel happy. [whop]

Source: Holy Grail

Quote of the Day (2008-08-25)

GALAHAD: They're doctors?!
ZOOT: Uh, they've had a basic medical training, yes.

Source: Holy Grail

Quote of the Day (2008-08-24)

Judith: [on Stan's desire to be a mother] Here! I've got an idea: Suppose you agree that he can't actually have babies, not having a womb - which is nobody's fault, not even the Romans' - but that he can have the *right* to have babies.
Francis: Good idea, Judith. We shall fight the oppressors for your right to have babies, brother... sister, sorry.
Reg: What's the *point*?
Francis: What?
Reg: What's the point of fighting for his right to have babies, when he can't have babies?
Francis: It is symbolic of our struggle against oppression.
Reg: It's symbolic of his struggle against reality.

Source: Life of Brian

Quote of the Day (2008-08-22)

Bernard Woolley (on the phone): "Yes, we will want simultaneous translators. ... No, not when the PM meets the leaders of the English speaking nations. ... Yes, the English speaking nations can be said to include the United States. With a certain generosity of spirit."

Source: Yes, Prime Minister

Quote of the Day (2008-08-21)

Jim Hacker: "Now look, I realise that you have to have loyalty to your colleagues, but you also have a broader loyalty to Cabinet and its policies."
Sir Humphrey: "I agree."
Jim Hacker: "You agree??"
Sir Humphrey: "Yes."
Jim Hacker: "You agree ... with me??"
Sir Humphrey: "I agree with you."
Jim Hacker: "Who do you agree with?"
Sir Humphrey: "With you."
Jim Hacker: "Not with Sir Frank?"
Sir Humphrey: "No."
Jim Hacker: "You're not arguing with me?"
Sir Humphrey: "No... Perhaps I haven't made myself quite clear. I agree with you."

Source: Yes, Prime Minister

Quote of the Day (2008-08-20)

Well, that's no ordinary rabbit. That's the most foul, cruel, and bad-tempered rodent you ever set eyes on.

Source: Holy Grail

Quote of the Day (2008-08-19)

Jim Hacker: "I have made a policy decision. I am going to do something about the number of women in the Civil Service."
Sir Humphrey: "Surely there aren't all that many?"

Source: Yes, Minister

Quote of the Day (2008-08-18)

Oh, I am afraid our life must seem very dull and quiet compared to yours. We are but eight score young blondes and brunettes, all between sixteen and nineteen and a half, cut off in this castle with no one to protect us! Oh, it is a lonely life -- bathing, dressing, undressing, making exciting underwear....

Source: Holy Grail

Quote of the Day (2008-08-17)

[Niles' new ad, which should describe him as a Jung specialist]
Niles: Remember the ad I placed. They have made a tiny little typo. See if you can find it.
Frasier: Niles Crane . . . Hung Specialist
Niles: The rest they got perfectly. Servicing individuals, couples, groups. Satisfaction guaranteed. Tell me when it hurts.

Source: Frasier

Quote of the Day (2008-08-15)

Lisa: Solitude never hurt anyone. Emily Dickinson lived alone, and she wrote some of the most beautiful poetry the world has ever known... then went crazy as a loon.

Source: The Simpsons

Race Code

Oh brother. Matthew Bigg writes of Obama

At the same time, references to his alleged "inexperience" as a one-term U.S. senator and perceived "arrogance" on a trip to Europe and the Middle East last month could also be seen as subtle racial digs, political commentators say.

Inexperience might be a substitute for an idea with roots in the era of U.S. slavery that African Americans couldn't be trusted, while arrogance can be a way of suggesting that black people are "uppity" or above their station, they said.

So calling a light-on-experience black man "inexperienced" is racist? How is that? Is every negative comment on Obama racist? That's convenient.

No wonder he goes on to say, "Understanding that code can be difficult." When you make it up as you go and whenever it's convenient, of course it's hard to figure out.

Quote of the Day (2008-08-14)

Lester Burnham: You don't think it's kinda weird & fascist?
Carolyn Burnham: Possibly, but you don't want to be unemployed.
Lester Burnham: Oh well, all right, let's all sell our souls and work for Satan because it's more convenient that way.

Source: American Beauty

Quote of the Day (2008-08-13)

Lester Burnham: [narrating] Both my wife and daughter think I'm this gigantic loser and they're right, I have lost something. I'm not exactly sure what it is but I know I didn't always feel this... sedated.

Source: American Beauty

Quote of the Day (2008-08-12)

Marty DiBergi: Do you feel that playing rock 'n' roll music keeps you a child? That is, keeps you in a state of arrested development?
Derek Smalls: No. No. No. I feel it's like, it's more like going, going to a, a national park or something. And there's, you know, they preserve the moose. And that's, that's my childhood up there on stage. That moose, you know.
Marty DiBergi: So when you're playing you feel like a preserved moose on stage?
Derek Smalls: Yeah.

Source: This is Spinal Tap

Quote of the Day (2008-08-11)

Alicia: There's nothing like a love song to give you a good laugh.

Source: Notorious

Quote of the Day (2008-08-10)

Matthias: Look, I don't think it should be a sin, just for saying "Jehovah".
[Everyone gasps]
Jewish Official: You're only making it worse for yourself!
Matthias: Making it worse? How can it be worse? Jehovah! Jehovah! Jehovah!
Jewish Official: I'm warning you! If you say "Jehovah" one more time (gets hit with rock) RIGHT! Who did that? Come on, who did it?
Stoners: She did! She did! (suddenly speaking as men) He! He did! He!
Jewish Official: Was it you?
Stoner: Yes.
Jewish Official: Right...
Stoner: Well you did say "Jehovah. "
[Crowd throws rocks at the stoner]
Jewish Official: STOP IT! STOP IT! STOP IT RIGHT NOW! STOP IT! All right, no one is to stone _anyone_ until I blow this whistle. Even... and I want to make this absolutely clear... even if they do say, "Jehovah. "
[Crowd stones the Jewish Official to death]

Source: Life of Brian

Quote of the Day (2008-08-09)

Jim Hacker: "Well, of course we do what we can. There are many calls on the public purse: inner cities, schools, hospitals, kidney machines..."
Actress one: "...tanks..."
Actress two: "...rockets..."
Actress three: "...H-bombs..."
Jim Hacker: "Well, we can't really defend ourselves against the Russians with a performance of Henry V."

Source: Yes, Prime Minister

Quote of the Day (2008-08-08)

Bernard Woolley: "They cannot stop us eating the British sausage, can they?"
Jim Hacker: "They can stop us calling it a sausage though. Apparently it has got to be called the Emulsified High-Fat Offal Tube."
Bernard Woolley: "And you swallowed it?"

Source: Yes, Minister

Quote of the Day (2008-08-07)

Jim Hacker: "Bernard, how did Sir Humphrey know I was with Dr. Cartwright?"
Bernard Woolley: "God moves in a mysterious way."
Jim Hacker: "Let me make one thing perfectly clear: Humphrey is not God, okay."
Bernard Woolley: "Will you tell him or shall I?"
Jim Hacker: "Tell me how he knew where I was."
Bernard Woolley: "Well, confidentially Minister, everything you tell me is in complete confidence, so equally, and I am sure you appreciate this, and by appreciate I don't actually mean appreciate, I mean understand, that everything Sir Humphrey tells me is also in complete confidence, as indeed everything I tell you is in complete confidence, and for that matter everything I tell Sir Humphrey is in complete confidence."
Jim Hacker: "So?"
Bernard Woolley: "So in complete confidence, I am confident that you understand that for me to keep Sir Humphrey's confidence and your confidence, means that conversations between him and me must be completely confidential, as confidential in fact as conversations between you and me are completely confidential."

Source: Yes, Minister

Quote of the Day (2008-08-06)

Duff book of records: Springfield is now the fattest city in the U.S.
Homer: Woo Hoo. In your face Milwaukee.

Source: The Simpsons

Quote of the Day (2008-08-05)

Carol: Fucking H.M.O. bastard pieces of shit!
Beverly Connelly: Carol!
Carol: Sorry.
Dr. Martin Bettes: It's okay. Actually, I think that's their technical name.

Source: As Good As It Gets

Quote of the Day (2008-08-04)

Buttercup: We'll never survive.
Westley: Nonsense. You're only saying that because no one ever has.

Source: The Princess Bride

Quote of the Day (2008-08-03)

Kid #3: My Mommy says smoking kills.
Nick Naylor: Oh, is your Mommy a doctor?
Kid #3: No.
Nick Naylor: A scientific researcher of some kind?
Kid #3: No.
Nick Naylor: Well then she's hardly a credible expert, is she?

Source: Thank You For Smoking